As I sit here on the couch with my Nutella covered spoon in hand (I’m only typing with my middle finger on my right hand… #skills), I waver between thinking that being a mom is awesome and being a mom kind of sucks, pretty much in the same mental sentence. The challenge is that I (like you and every other mom out there) am waaayy more than *just* a mom. Yes, I have two beautiful boys whom I love more than life itself. I also work and exercise and used to be an athlete, and I have a million hobbies I no longer have time for. We are all so excellently complicated that a part about motherhood that sucks is how easily we get put in a box. Our triumphs and struggles are both universal and completely individualized when you get into the details. (By the way, that Nutella was gone before the second sentence.)

The reasons for why being a mom is awesome seem really obvious, but lately, being brutally real and shocking is more entertaining, so the lovely reasons aren’t stated. Holding my sleeping babies is one of the most precious and joy-filled experiences of my life so far. Thinking of those early, first REAL smiles from my babies still brings tears to my eyes. Reading stories with and watching my older son grow and thrive and learn how to tell jokes is so much fun. Being a parent is finally actually starting to be FUN and not just stressful. That might sound overly blunt, and maybe I should’ve figured out how to enjoy the first two and a half years of my older son’s life a little earlier on, but I just didn’t. I was always worried I wasn’t (or we weren’t) doing things the right way. I still really care about my sons’ progress through stages and milestones, but gradually, the weight has lightened. We finally started trusting our instincts, as our moms and pediatricians told us to do from day 1.

I suppose I’m not saying anything new. Most of you are probably thinking you’ve read this before. But new statement or not, we could probably all be a little less judgmental of other moms. This is also part of why being a mom sucks sometimes. Being a mom along with being a well-rounded person is SO HARD, and the judgment only makes it harder. It probably stems from a number of issues – feelings of insecurity or inadequacy, maybe jealousy, differences in upbringing, among many others. I do it too! I am judgy of judgy moms!! That is still a judgment on someone else. So what I’m saying is, can we live and let live? Can we hoe our own row and raise our own babies, in the words of the song Biscuits by Kacey Musgraves? Maybe even mend our own fences and own our own crazy? Yeah, I love that song… 

That’s what this blog will try to be about. Silly stories, lessons I’ve learned, a craft here and there, hopefully without judgment. This is really hard. I get it.