Who decides what things get studied? I get that money dictates a lot of it. Boner pills do nothing good for society, but you figured out that rich guys would pay a lot of money for them, so you were like, sure let’s study the heck out of this non-issue of old dudes not being able to feel young and virile anymore. This is the issue of our age that must be solved! So, money. Ok, fine. 

MEANWHILE … less than 4% of federal funding goes towards pediatric cancer, and 46 kids are diagnosed with some type of cancer in the US every day. OH! And only 3 new drugs have been approved for pediatric cancer in over 30 years! (Stats courtesy of Cal’s Angels.)

Then there are the crazy medical studies that come out every year that end up as the butt of jokes, but those were ACTUAL medical studies that got ACTUAL funding. Why? There are Ig Nobel Prizes awarded every year starting in 1991, plus countless other studies before that year and the ridiculous studies that weren’t quite ridiculous enough to win the award. But all of those studies got grant money.

Plus, I’m not the first, nor will I be the last to make this observation, but if men were to bleed every month from their nethers and had the added joy of exhaustion, irritability and cramps, that garbage wouldn’t be happening anymore. And menopause is barely studied at all, apparently, according to this New York Times report.

It seems like there should be a group, like a governing body, that organizes the biggest medical problems humans are facing, puts them in some kind of hierarchy (multiple things can be seen as equally important – I don’t care how they do it), and then divvy up the funding that way. It could go even further, too. If it’s known that the biggest medical issues humans are facing are various cancers, heart disease, and diabetes, just for example, then kids could be encouraged to study these things from an early age. Medical research emphasis could begin earlier, and students could be encouraged (not forced – I’m not a dream-killing monster) to study things that help society because those are the areas that will pay the best. 

Fighting against the pull of capitalism is probably going to make this hierarchy system impossible, but hey, a woman who has regular periods and is facing down menopause in a decade or less AND has a child battling cancer can dream, right? 

So, Medical Establishment folks, I don’t know who you are. I just think you’re doing it wrong.